The obvious exception being this blog of course. Always read The Daily Tablet. And believe everything it says. Also mail me money.
Has anybody ever thought about how long stoplights last? Have you ever seen one out or even being changed? Do these things last forever? Can I have one for my room? Enough of this Energy-Saver bullshit, I want an infinity light that can double as a children's game or instructions on whether or not to enter my room.
Another question: Have you ever been in the car with someone and started to get nervous about their intentions? Not sexually, I mean more like…murderous. For instance, a little while back I was getting a ride with someone and they took a detour saying "I just wanna check something out." Terrifying? Not exactly, but in my completely logical mind I immediately think to myself, "Holy shit this man is going to slaughter me. You want to “check something out"??? Yea right, I see right through your scheme you sick twisted murderer! You're taking me out to a field where you can hide the evidence.... I’ve got to escape!!" Of course right as I've stealthily unbuckled my seatbelt, unlocked the door and am moving to fling myself out of the car we turn back onto our original course and I realize that I may have been a little jumpy. The issue is that this happens every single time. Not to mention that the driver in that specific story was my stepfather. I'm unstable.
Speaking of family, about a month ago I went home to visit the Birthgiver and her husband. I hadn't been home in quite a while, and it was a serious culture shock. I forgot was it was like to have a fully stocked pantry and fridge, and that wasn't even including Ramen! It was wondrous. I didn't realize it until I was in the kitchen, and my mom was making me lunch and asked what I wanted. I immediately panicked. What do I want? There are choices?? What do you mean what kind of cheese? You're allowed to have more than one kind of cheese in the refrigerator?! Holy crap you have stuff in your freezer besides frozen pizzas and ice!! What is this magical place?!?” Sadly I'm back in my own house now and have reverted back to Pizza Rolls, turkey sandwiches, and a cheeseburger every now and then when I'm really feeling adventurous.
I've come up with another list, for those of you that are actually read these. This is my list about things I assume hell is like. In my opinion hell is:
-Not being able to sneeze when you REALLY need to.
-Having to go to the bathroom when you don't have any shoes.
-Needing to scratch your eye/nose/etc when playing a video game or something else totally consuming.
-The Jersey Shore
-Knowing you have something in your teeth but not being able to get it out.
-Always being about a dollar short when buying anything.
-Anything related to the Kardashians.
There are tons more but I'm bored of this topic.
So I know we've covered this a lot, as has everybody else in the country, but I'm seriously getting sick of Chickfila's policies. Not the gay/anti-gay stuff cause honestly, it's chicken, who gives a shit? I don't even want to know what the owners of McDonald's opinions are, I’m assuming they're against human life or happiness or something. I'm talking about the being closed on Sundays. I realize that's part of their Christian image, but let's be real, Chickfila being closed on Sundays isn't going to make me a better person. If anything, it's going to make me sit around and sulk all day like a troll with rage issues all because I can't get two chicken egg and cheese biscuits, hash browns, biscuits and gravy, OJ, and a large Ice Dream. It's torture.
Fear of the Day: Papaphobia: A pathological fear of Popes.
Shout out to Emily Rycenga.
